You know sometimes I live in such a fantasy world in reality that I get such big idea’s like how write trilogies, design theme parks, paralleling launching, thinking years in advance that I forget the small stuff.
I truly do what I think is Imagineer type thinking but I forget how to do the small stuff and come down to practical thinking. Women are great for this. Well most after in they are in their thirties or better anyway.
I used to think this was an illness in a way and perhaps there is some truth to that. Is creating crap all the time an illness. I’m not talking about social media so much as that is easy to break away from. What I am talking about creating idea’s from nothing to immersion experiences.
I work my ass off in so many different ways other than the practical. It’s partially due to physical limitations that probably are not all that severe if I try but realistically they do exist and on top of that I have bi-polar.
Sometimes I also feel demographically speaking I cannot get my proper medication. I honestly don’t care about money when I have the basics that I need and a few wants but when all that runs out from my small personal monthly income because I try to improve situations and environment to much I sure get depressed.
I wrote a movie based on such theme (With many other layered themes) once because while all is not well on a personal level on a creative level nothing can stop a man like me.
I’ve heard people say before you are the only one stopping you and this may indeed be true but damn it; is the practical world necessary at some point. I kind of hope not and this doesn’t make me lose touch with reality either.
There is probably some beautiful dialogue here if I really thought about and I don’t think this blog today is too personal either. I can think just about like anyone. I can write my ass off and I could probably have a polished episode of nearly any show I chose within 3-4 weeks. Probably 3 with the right collaborator’s and inspirational type people just like myself.
I feel destined to screw up sometimes because of lack of a truly helpful support team. I belong locked into a damn studio somewhere to work on a never ending multiverse of projects.
Here’s another thing and I don’t have to prove it but I truly can think like a Walt Disney. My life and culmination of experiences somewhat parallel’s his only in a longer time frame of life on a personal level. But here’s the thing anyone who has been successful you can parallel aspects of life with truly.
I’ve always been the introvert kid picked on standing outside the circle watching life as an observer but nowadays I have evolved to also be a social butterfly in a sense.
In healthcare I used to be the happy go lucky make you laugh, make you smile in shitty situations type guy and those are the people I always need around me now.
I’ve been an ass, I’ve been arrogant, I’ve been humble, I’ve been apologetic, I have been on the extreme side of right and wrong, I’ve been fallible and because of my dedication I’ve also been near infallible almost as perfect as one can be. I’m not an actor but damn with my life experience sometimes I sure wonder why I’m not. Perhaps it is just my fortunate or unfortunate being born with a lack a vanity or destroying any healthy vanity I did have with crappy decisions in my youth.
All experiences make us who we are. I’m a mostly good person that should stand up for myself in life more and create more opportunity for myself. (Even practical opportunity for myself as I cringe) but I also can’t lose sight of what I’m truly meant to do and be.
Serious practical life periodic struggles suck.
Funny how all that rambling comes to one impactful line of dialogue.
Michael Lee Burris
“I will never stop driving a creative revolutionary wheel of desire and determination always needing genuine help along the way.”